Saturday, January 10, 2009

Simplicity in its simplest form

Although my poetic entries are good, I am running low on fuel for them.

In other news I wonder how I am capable of making the same mistake twice. The worse part about this mistake is that I knowingly did it all on my own. I had it in the back of my mind from the beginning and I think that is what may have messed me up.  Oh well, I just have to teach myself to not take things so seriously. I think If I were capable of letting go of whatever is holding me back, I would be a whole lot more happier than I am as of this very moment 

I am however in a very decent mood, even with my winter break coming to an end, I believe I did not waste a single second of it being sad or confused like I usually would. I am thrilled by simplicity suddenly and I am enjoying each moment it enters my world. For instances, I ordered Netflix and for some reason I cannot tell you how ecstatic I am for it! I put loads of foreign films on it along with independent ones I have always wanted to see! 

I've been discovering simplicity in my most complicated relationships. I'm uncovering the small things that I never noticed before and realizing that the people in my life are more worth it than one could imagine. I am realizing that although I am "alone" romantically speaking, that I am better off and I am realizing that relationships that are formed now may not last, that I am not at a point where I need one or even long for one. 

I am still at the point where I do not know what I want from my life, which may be a bad thing but who knows. I am unsure of where I should transfer to in a year or what I am going to do when I get there but I do know that no matter what I am always taking my photos with me. I know that when I am completely done with college I am packing all my belongings and I am going cross country to California and there I will become a vagabond and learn about life the real way. I am determined to do all this and yet I feel no sense of direction. oh my.


Wednesday, January 7, 2009

The Complications of a Mathematic Equation

I tried doing the long division and seeing what matched up
But the amount of time and the life lines upon your hands didn't meet
Those hands I thought I knew so well were telling stories of a lost past 
As the fresh Wyoming air hit my hair and then bounced back
 Visions of these midwest dreams were barely able to play out
While I looked out my window to see the plastic, fake, cheap imagery
As Pink Flamingos lined up and down this sad pathetic street
I remember regretting never knowing Mom well enough before I left
And Dad sent me a postcard this fall saying he wish I were here
I tried doing the long division and seeing where It went wrong
As I find that this simple algebra, is more complex than it seems


Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Sighing & then Some:

I'm so incredibly bored right now, with everything.


Sunday, January 4, 2009

The Same Strokes lead into Old Habits

Where this sea of quilts that once embodied you are covered in your scent
I pretend you lay closer to mean than where you are in actuality
And I can only wish I were fragile and blue for you, waiting in the melancholy waste
As prayers and conversations with God begin to mean less and less than before
Just as Early mornings meet late afternoons, we lose track of all time, track of our minds
While the older women down the street converse about their youth, we're trapped in ours
As my hands reach to your cheeks to touch your beautiful porcelain cheeks
I imagine our bodies falling into the sea and my eyes wake before we hit the bottom
While these strokes lead us into all of our old habits, You keep on coming back


Friday, January 2, 2009

This vague feeling of Winter

As I curled up in my gray sweater, the one you always said never fit 
This fit of human emotion runs through me and I am left without words
December showed itself in a terribly beautiful way, It allowed me to exist
All the while it took me everything to realize It could be you, as I let it slip by
Watching as my body challenged all the things my heart began to realize 
Trapped in an everlasting statue of unmoved regrets, I am idle in thought
this vague feeling of winter is beginning to give me wings, If only I could soar

If I were to question these movements, would you question me?

cheers loves, happy 2009!